


End of the (Punch) Line

by SCFrankles



Category: Punch and Judy
Genre: Community: fan_flashworks, Gen, Humor, Puppets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-23
Updated: 2015-05-23
Packaged: 2018-03-31 21:54:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3994270
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SCFrankles/pseuds/SCFrankles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Judy is making an appearance on a chat show.</p>
            </blockquote>





	End of the (Punch) Line

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [Challenge 119: Punch](http://fan-flashworks.livejournal.com/503579.html) at [Fan Flashworks](http://fan-flashworks.livejournal.com/) on LJ.
> 
> _Andy Pandy_ was created by Freda Lingstrom and produced by the BBC (though my Looby Loo has very little to do with the original character ^^).
> 
> * * *

“...and now it’s time to meet our very special guest—Judy!”

Punch scowled at the TV screen as the applause grew, but he turned up the sound and leaned forward in his seat. 

Judy came into view, acknowledging the studio audience with a smile, and sat down opposite her interviewer, Looby Loo.

“So,” said Looby Loo, as the applause faded away. “Thank you for joining us! I believe you’re very busy at the moment—you’re in the middle of making some big changes in your life?”

“That’s right, Looby,” said Judy, making herself comfortable. “In fact, that’s why I agreed to come on the programme—I think it’s time to put all the rumours to rest. Yes, Punch and I have split up.”

There was a groan from the audience, and in his sitting room Punch took a swig from a bottle of vodka. 

Judy gave an apologetic shrug. “After 350 years doing the same act, I just felt it was time for a change.”

Looby Loo put on the sympathetic expression which meant she was about to ask something highly impertinent. “And I gather it’s not just a professional split..?”

“No.” Judy bowed her head. “We’re getting a divorce too.”

“Physical cruelty?” asked Looby Loo hopefully.

“Oh, no!” said Judy, looking up in horror. “No, he’s nothing like he is on stage. He’s a dear, sweet man.” She sighed. “It’s just his catchphrase—he won’t leave it behind at the end of the show. When he does the washing up: _‘That’s the way to do it!’_ When he does the vacuuming: _‘That’s the way to do it!’_ When he successfully navigates the one-way system into town: _‘That’s the way to do it!’_ It was steadily driving me insane.” Her voice dropped a little. “But it was him introducing it into more... intimate situations that was the final straw.”

“Gosh, that sounds awful,” said Looby Loo. “Would you… like to talk about it?”

“No,” said Judy, firmly.

“Pity,” murmured Looby Loo. She produced a bright smile. “So what’s next for you?”

Judy looked thoughtful. “Well, I’m keeping my options open. I’ve been in talks with the Muppets. And Sooty and Sweep have shown an interest.”

“Fabulous!” said Looby Loo.

Judy nodded. “I’m feeling greatly optimistic about the future.” She smiled. “It’s my manager I really have to thank for that, I suppose—our ‘Punchman’, as we call him. Punch and I have worked with him for a very long time, and he’s always been there behind the scenes keeping the show going. And you see, he was the one who encouraged me to make the break and try something new. Actually—” 

Punch stabbed down with a finger, and his estranged wife abruptly disappeared. Tossing the remote control aside, he picked up the vodka bottle and then glared hard at the blank screen.

“Bloody Punchman,” he muttered. “Should have known he’d have a hand in it.”


End file.
